Little Santa

The alarm clock, for some reason, did not go off on Christmas morning and Candace leapt from her bed in a panic at ten minutes after ten. “Oh my God, I slept in!” she gasped, and after that one brief moment of foggy revelation everything else was rush, rush, rush.

She had been up until 2:30 in the morning trying to get everything ready for the family get together that was planned for today. People would be arriving at noon and she still had plenty of things yet to do. Of course Josh had been no help at all the night before. He had been constantly pestering her with “How do you spell this, and how do you spell that?” for some last minute letter he was trying to write to Santa. After spelling out about 20 or so words for him she had snapped at him to leave her alone.

“Josh! Enough already! Can’t you see I’m busy here? Santa won’t even get this letter until after Christmas, so if you’re asking him for any extra toys you’re wasting your time. ”

“I was just writing to thank him, momma,” Josh said. He had a confused look on his face, as if he thought she should have known that. Suddenly Candace felt a little guilty, and that made her even more irate. She didn’t need to feel guilty on top of everything else.

“Just spell it however you want. Stop bothering me with every little word.”

It was a little bit later, that she noticed Josh come in from outside at nine o’clock at night. She hadn’t even noticed him leave.

“Josh! Where have you been? Outside by yourself at this time of night!”

“I just had to mail that letter, momma.”

“You know you’re not supposed to leave the house without permission, especially this late at night!”

“The mailbox is just down the street. I also went to say goodnight to Timmy and Tommy too. They were just watching out the window for Santa and-”

“You know you’re not supposed to play with them. Their mother doesn’t like you hanging around there all the time.”

“But momma, they’re my friends!”

She sent him immediately to bed. With so much to do she didn’t have time to argue with him.

“Santa doesn’t come if the kids aren’t asleep. You know that.”

“Yeah, I know. ‘Night, momma,” he said, and dragged his rumpled little teddy bear by one hand off to bed.

Now it was Christmas morning. Now it was a mad rush to get everything done in time, and her first thought was that she would go downstairs and see that Josh had already mangled all his presents open and left a big mess all over the living room floor like he had done last year.

“Josh! You better not have gotten into your presents already. What will the family think if none of the presents under the tree for you are from me?”

She remembered being embarrassed last year about that. Though nobody said anything, she knew what they were thinking, and she over-explained how Josh had already opened all his presents before they’d even gotten there.

Josh was laying in front of the Christmas tree, filling in one of Santa’s boots in a coloring book with a black crayon. The presents were untouched.

“How do you spell ‘believe’, momma?” Josh asked, glancing up from the page he was working on.

“Who said you could plug the Christmas tree in? That’s very dangerous, Josh. You know you’re not supposed to play with the plugs.”

“I was just trying to help, momma. I’m sorry.”

“I’ve got so much to do. I’ve got so much to do!” Candace muttered over and over to herself as she hurried out of the room.

“Momma! How do you spell ‘believe’?”

“Not now, Josh. I told you last night I don’t have time for that. Just spell it like it sounds.”

So for the next hour Candace rush, rush, rushed around, trying to get everything ready in time, trying to beat the clock, trying to make everything perfect before that first ring of the doorbell announced the arrival of the first in-laws. She knew it was next to impossible to get everything done in time, and she really wished she had some help. She was so stressed out that she once again bit Josh’s head off for incessantly hollering “Ho, ho, ho! Ho, ho, ho!” up and down the halls in his jolliest little Christmas voice. “Ho, ho, ho! Merry Christmas!”

“Josh! Shush!” was all she could say. “If you’re not going to help me, you could at least go and play somewhere and stop driving me nuts!”

“Can I go see Timmy and Tommy?”

“No! I told you already, their mother doesn’t like you over there all the time!”

“But it’s Christmas! I have to see my friends on Christmas.”

He was getting upset now.

“We have people coming over in twenty minutes and you’re not going anywhere. Now go and get dressed! Hurry!”

“Can I go and see them later?”

“No, Josh! I just finished telling you we have people coming over. How would that look if you just left us all and went to play with your grubby little friends?”

“They’re not grubby!” Josh retorted indignantly.

“Josh, I’m not going to stand here and argue with you. I’ve got so much to do, and you’re not helping me at all. Now just get upstairs and get dressed before I get really angry.”

“They’re not grubby. It’s not nice to call people mean names like that, and you should-”

“Josh! Now!” Candace hollered, teetering at the end of her patience.

Tears burst from Josh’s eyes and he turned and ran up the stairs.

“You’re mean like the Grinch!” he told her without looking back.

“Yes, that’s why I got you those stupid little presents, isn’t it! Maybe I should just take them back to the store! You won’t even play with them anyway!”

The presents she had gotten him weren’t even really a surprise. He picked them out himself at the store the week before. He lifted each one off the shelf with big bright eyes and said, “Momma, can Santa get me this for Christmas?”

“Why would you want that? You don’t like those kinds of toys?”

A shopper jostled past Candace in the aisle, impatiently grimacing at her as though she were merely an obstacle in the path, and not even a human being. Her cart was knocked sideways and bumped into Josh’s arm. He rubbed at it unconsciously, but didn’t really seem to notice.

“Excuse me!” Candace snarled at the woman. “Some of us are trying to shop here. How rude!”

“Go to hell,” the woman muttered under her breath, but Candace heard her and for a moment she wanted to take that stupid toy Josh was holding and hurl it at the woman’s fat and ugly head. Some Christmas spirit!

“Please, momma. Can I please get this?” Josh whined.

“You won’t even play with this thing, Josh. I know you won’t!”

“But Timmy and Tommy love these things!”

“Oh, well that explains it. You just have to get everything Timmy and Tommy like, don’t you? I suppose if they jumped off a bridge you’d jump off with them.”

“No, momma. Timmy jumped off a bridge last week and I didn’t do it too.”

“That figures,” Candace muttered. “I don’t know where their mother is half the time and I honestly think…”

Josh didn’t even hear the rest. Candace had absent-mindedly tossed the two presents into her cart. He grinned ecstatically to himself and kept quiet so she wouldn’t change her mind.

She had thought of arguing the point with him. It seemed like a waste of money to buy him presents he wouldn’t even play with, but she let it go. At least she wouldn’t have to worry about picking anything else out. It was one less worry she had to deal with, and if he didn’t like it on Christmas morning that would be his own fault.

Candace thought about that day at the mall as she rapidly tidied up the living room. Josh’s coloring book and crayons were all over the floor. There were pages ripped out of it with little dedications scribbled across the top of each one. “Dear Tommy, I hope you beleev in Santa this yeer. Hes really real. I saw him at the mal with momma. Love, Josh.” Another one said, “Dear, Timmy. Santa will bring you a presint this year. I jist no it. Love, Josh.”

“Yeah, right,” Candace muttered. “Santa doesn’t visit kids with negligent alcoholic mothers.” Then she yelled, “Josh, come get these pictures you left all over the place. Now! And take your crayons upstairs with you.”

Josh came down gathered up his pictures and crayons, and sullenly slinked back up the stairs.

The first ring on the doorbell came shortly after 12:00 PM. The first guests were admitted and sat down, while Candace hurried around getting the last few things in order. She had not even taken a moment to have any breakfast, and she didn’t think Josh had either. Candace turned on a CD of Christmas music, and fetched them a cup of hot chocolate and eggnog.

“The place looks wonderful, Candace darling. I just love this time of year, don’t you?” her mother-in-law called from the kitchen.

“That’s easy for you to say, you old crone,” Candace muttered under her breath. “Don’t offer to help me or anything.” But out loud she called back, “Yes, it’s wonderful isn’t it?”

“I honestly don’t know why Douglas left you. You’re such a wonderful person.”

Then Candace heard her father-in-law mutter, “Gwen, shush! You don’t need to bring that up at a time like this!”

“Why not,” Gwen bickered back. “It’s true, isn’t it?”

“Quiet. She’s coming.”

They both went silent and smiled broadly as she entered the room. Candace put on a phony smile of her own, and decided she couldn’t wait until the rest of the family got here. She couldn’t stand her parents-in-law at times.

“Well at least I still have you two,” she grinned at them, setting a tray of dainties down on the coffee table in front of them.

“Well we’re not going anywhere,” Gwen announced cheerfully.

“Lucky me,” Candace smirked. Then she headed back into the kitchen hoping to avoid anymore awkward moments.

Josh came in and presented them with pages that he had colored himself, with similar dedications on the top of each one. Candace could hear them reading and laughing as they read each one aloud.

“Dear Gandma. ‘Gandma’. Isn’t that adorable? Dear Gandma. I hope you like this picture. I collared it myself. Oh, collared. That’s adorable, isn’t it, Jack? Collared. How adorable.”

“Mine says, dear Grimpa.”

“Oh ‘Grimpa’. How adorable.”

“Dear grimpa. Santa sed you give good gifts. He likes when you help him out. Love Josh. And look, Gwen. There are a bunch of little elves making toys. That’s wonderful, Josh.”

Candace rolled her eyes. How phony can you get? She thought to herself.

“Momma wouldn’t help me with the spelling. I’m sorry of there’s any mistakes.”

“I was very busy, Josh,” Candace interjected from the kitchen. “You know that. I had to get everything done myself, you know.”

Her face was flushed hot with embarrassment. “What kind of mother will they think I am? I don’t even have time to help my son with his spelling. Well if they’re so upset about it they can get everything done all by themselves next year and see if they have time to look after every single little trivial thing Josh needs all day long!”

Of course, nobody had even said anything, but she knew what they were thinking in their hearts. They’d made such a big deal about Josh not having any presents from her last year, asking over and over again if there was anything under the tree from mom. “He damn well opened them all before you even got here. I’m sorry I couldn’t watch him every single moment of the day. I’m a terrible mother, okay!”

Candace stopped her train of thought. She was getting madder and madder and she had to force herself to calm down. Thankfully, the doorbell rang again and she was distracted from the inner turmoil of having her motherhood put on trial by these folks who had no idea what being a single mother was all about.

More and more guests arrived. Josh’s uncle Alex showed up with his latest girlfriend Darla. Max and Christine, Douglas’ brother and sister-in-law arrived, and finally Dennis and Phillip, Darla’s two teen-aged sons walked through the door. The pile of presents under the tree grew. Candace rolled her eyes and dreaded the clean up she would have to do afterwards, all by herself once again no doubt.

“Wow! There’s so many!” Josh beamed. “This is great!”

“Easy for you to say, kid,” his uncle Alex grunted. “You didn’t have to pay for it all.”

“And you won’t have to clean it all up after,” Candace added.

“Now, now, let’s not complain,” Gwen chided them. “We should be grateful for the blessing we have.”

That was easy for her to say, Candace thought. She had the most money to blow on Christmas, and the least cleaning to do. In the real world people struggled for their “blessings”.

“Santa told me Christmas is not even about presents,” Josh piped in. “He says friends and family is most important of all.”

“Fine. We’ll just take all your presents back to the store then, Josh,” Uncle Alex replied.

“No way!” Josh objected, and there was an eruption of laughter.

Finally everyone was settled and they began the opening of presents.

“Now you didn’t go ahead and open all your presents already like you did last year, did you Josh?”

They just had to bring that up, didn’t they? Candace grimaced inwardly.

“Nope,” he grinned. “Not even one.”

The presents were passed out one by one and for a brief moment Candace was filled with a little bit of holiday cheer. The carols played softly and the family was unified in the sharing of gifts. Perhaps all the trouble was worth it after all, Candace thought. The peaceful Christmas moment passed quickly however when Josh was offered one of the presents “from Momma”.

“I don’t want to open that one right now,” Josh said, and he passed a present to Uncle Alex instead. “Here you go, Uncle.”

“Sheesh. I never heard of a kid who refused a present before,” Alex muttered.

Candace on the other hand was not so cheerful about it. The hint of aggravation began to grow in her heart as she wondered if Josh would cause any problems for her like he did last year. “Great,” she thought. “He picks out presents he doesn’t even like and now he doesn’t even want them. Crazy kid. This is all I need: another reason for them all to think I’m a bad mother.”

The pile slowly got smaller and smaller, and the mess got bigger and bigger. Dennis knocked over a lamp throwing a basketball he’d gotten, and Darla spilled a glass of wine on the carpet with nothing more than a simple “Oops, clumsy me.” Candace hurried around here and there, cleaning up spills, re-righting fallen lamps, and stuffing shredded wrapping paper into a garbage bag, and they all simply passed things to her, as though she were a mere servant, and not the hostess. She was also running in and out of the kitchen as well, checking on the dinner periodically at the same time, and fetching beverages and dainties for the guests as well. They shouted orders at her like some sort of waitress or something. Imagine treating someone like a petty servant on Christmas day. How indignant, and not a single one of them offered to help in anyway. She began to grind her teeth at this, but kept up her phony smile.

“Here’s another one for Josh, from Momma. You want this one, Josh?”

“No. Not right now. I’ll open it later.”

“Open it now, Josh. Everyone wants to see what momma got you.”

Momma wants everyone to see what she got you, was what she really meant, but Josh refused to let her off the hook of embarrassment.

“Can’t I open it later? It’s a special one.”

“Open it now, Joshy,” Candace said, now with an edge of impatience in her voice.

“Here. Here’s one for Grampa Jack,” Josh offered, trying to change the subject.

Jack took his present and the focus turned to him while he opened it. Candace however turned a sideways glance at Josh, accusing him of humiliating her with her eyes.

“Look, momma,” Josh said nervously. “Grandpa got a watch!”

“Actually,” Candace said. “I didn’t notice any presents that you got for anyone else, Josh. What did you do with the money I gave you?”

“I made everyone pictures, momma. Santa says gifts you make yourself are more valuable than anything you buy in the store. It’s the thought that counts.”

“A department store Santa said that?” Alex chortled. “I bet he was fired after the first day.”

“What did you do with the money then, Josh?” Candace asked again.

After an tense silence Josh confessed, “I spent it.”

“Well that’s a fairly selfish way to be at Christmas,” Gwen said. “You’re supposed to think of others before yourself, Josh. Don’t you know that?”

“What did you spend it on?”

Josh remained silent. He was almost pained with the thought of confessing anything more.

“You spent it on yourself, didn’t you, Josh?”

“I guess so,” Josh sighed. “Sorry.”

He seemed more confused than sad, however, and Candace was curious as to what he had bought. She hadn’t noticed him carrying anything out of the mall that day. It was a hectic day of course. There could have been a U.F.O. flying over head and she would have missed that too.

“Well a person’s entitled to spend a little on themselves now and then,” Uncle Alex said. “I got myself a new bowling ball last week.”

“Can we get back to the presents now?” Phillip groaned.

The pile got smaller and smaller, and Candace grew more and more tense as she hurried around trying to stay on top of the mess. Finally there were only two gifts left and Josh still refused to open them.

“Those are the only two left, Josh. You have to open them now.”

“I don’t want to,” Josh said. “I want to save them for later.”

“We’re opening the gifts now, Josh. Open them now.”

“Later,” he said, and then quickly added, “I want to play with the Choo_Choo Uncle Alex got me. See? It makes a funny noise. Isn’t that adorable, hey? Choo! Choo!”

There was an awkward silence as they all looked from Candace to Josh and back at Candace, and then at the Choo-Choo. Candace was flushed with internal rage and she could swear she felt their gazes upon her, judging her.

She such a terrible mother, he doesn’t even want the gifts she got him! Imagine that!

“I’ll check on the turkey. Josh can open it later, if he wants to. Or never. I don’t care.”

She hurried out of the room. She was near tears, and her hands were shaking, but somehow she fought it off. She took a couple of deep breaths and forced herself to just focus on the turkey. Just get through this. She could deal with Josh’s incensing antics later. This was definitely the last straw. She had a good mind to take those stupid $40 ‘Talking Trucks’ back to the store the very next shopping day. He obviously didn’t want them. She had been right all along. She never should have let him pick out his own gifts.

Somehow she managed to get supper on the table, denying drink requests shouted from the living room periodically. Her guts were burning with resentment now.

“Candace, darling, will you bring me a glass of Brandy?”

“I’m really very busy right now, Gwen. You’ll have to get it yourself.”

“I’m a guest, Candace dear. I will not serve myself in your house. It’s simply not proper.”

Candace felt like screaming at her, “If you want a drink get up off your lazy butt and get it yourself, you miserable old crone! I am not your slave!” but instead she simply said, “Dinner will be ready in ten minutes. If you want me to fetch every little drink for you it will be twenty minutes and the food will be burned.”

“I’ll get it for you, Grandma,” Josh offered.

“I’m sure you would, darling Josh, but you should not be handling liquor at your age.”

“I’m sure he could handle it better than you, you old lush,” Candace muttered to herself.

“Let him get it, Gwen. He can handle it. It’s not like he’s gonna drink the stuff. You better not anyway, kid,” Alex Laughed. Alex himself already had a bit of a slur in his voice. Candace cringed as she recalled him throwing up in the fireplace the year before.

“There’s some milk an’ cookies fer ya, Santy,” he had babbled. There had been an eruption of laughter, but it had been Candace who had to clean it up. She hadn’t found it funny at all.

Josh came into the kitchen. “Choo Choo!” he shouted, startling Candace from her reverie. “Where the brandy, momma!”

“Josh,” she hissed angrily, instantly dousing his Christmas cheer with the intensity of her tone. “What in the hell do you think you’re doing not opening your presents in front of everyone. How could you embarrass me like that?”

Josh stood frozen, almost panicked. Finally he spoke.

“Sorry, momma. I just wanted to save them until later. Why do I gotta open ‘em now anyways?”

“So that everyone can see you open them, and they won’t think I’m a bad mother.”

“Santa says Christmas is not about what you get-”

“I don’t give a damn what Santa told you. Santa’s not a hardworking single mother with a horde of judgmental in-laws hovering over her every move like a bunch of god damned vultures.”

Josh was not entirely sure what she was talking about, but he could tell by her tone of voice that she was very upset, and that she was talking more to herself than to him anyway. He said nothing in reply.

“The brandy is on the counter. Take the bottle to Grandma and she can fill her own glass if she needs it so badly.”

“Momma, please don’t be angry. It’s Christmas,” Josh said.

“It may be Christmas for all of you, but for me it’s just another day of work.”

Josh reflected on this for a moment and then offered, “You’re doing a good job, momma. Everyone is happy.”

Then he took the bottle from the counter and carried it under his arm to the living room.

“I’d be happy too, if I had a slave to wait on me hand and foot,” she sneered to herself.

Josh was right though, in one way. It was Christmas and she should be happy about having family over. She wasn’t though, and she began to feel guilty and ungrateful once again. Then she felt angry that she felt guilty, and she felt even worse. She slammed the turkey down onto the center of the table in the dining room and all heads turned to see what the big fuss was all about.

The bitterness melted from her face back into the phony smile she had plastered on all day.

“Dinner’s ready,” she said sweetly, rebuked back into good cheer by their critical gazes. Then she strode back into the kitchen to fetch the stuffing and potatoes.

There was a mountain of food and it looked like a veritable banquet set before them. They praised her for all her preparations but she was already too upset to be encouraged by their kind words. If they were really so thankful you’d think they could have lifted a finger to help her, she thought angrily, but smiled, nodded, and politely thanked them.

Then Josh continued causing problems for her. He piled his plate high with enough food for two of him, and he sat there jabbering away with everyone, not touching a bite of it.

Candace was beyond stressed by this time and could not eat either. She sat there staring at the mountain of turkey, potatoes, corn, peas, and stuffing on his plate, already deciding that it was sure to go to waste, without a single bite of it being touched. She was so upset she could not even speak to him about it. She just sat there, sipping her cold coffee, and trying to fight off the cold sneer that wanted to spread across her face. Then her eyes wandered from one guest to another, hearing their inane chatter, but not really listening. It all seemed so phony, and she began to feel as sad as she was angry. She began to feel like Christmas had been robbed from her. The one time of the year when she was supposed to be happy no matter what was going on--it had been stolen from her by this ravenous pack of hyenas.

“Josh, aren’t you gonna eat your supper?” Gwen asked him.

Josh looked down at the pile and picked at one little carrot with his fork. Then he glanced at grandma, saw she was no longer watching, and dropped it back onto her plate.

Candace said nothing. She was too tired now, mentally, emotionally, and physically to fight with him about it. If he didn’t eat he would go hungry. Too bad for him.

She didn’t eat either, however. Her stomach was knotted into a ball of tension and she thought that if she took one bite she would throw up all over the table. She just sat there, glancing from one guest to another, with a façade of a smile, pretending she was enjoying the holiday festivities. She felt robbed though, and she was very bitter.

And Josh wouldn’t even touch his food.

“Josh, dear,” Gwen said again. “Eat your supper now. It’s not good to be wasteful.”

“Yes, Josh,” Candace added. “Why don’t you eat? Or are you going to be difficult again.”

“First he doesn’t want her presents, now he doesn’t want her food,” Uncle Alex sniggered, stuffing half a turkey into his mouth and washing it down with a swig of beer.

“Yes, eat up, Josh,” Grandpa Jack said. “You’ll make your mother feel bad.”

Suddenly Candace felt the attention turned back onto her. There was an uncomfortable silence.

“I’m saving it for later,” he said meekly, as though expecting a rebuke.

There was another awkward silence. Somebody coughed, and a fork clinked against a plate.

“Well you should never force a child to eat. It’s not healthy,” Darla commented.

“Why did he take such a mountain of food then?” Gwen asked. “It’s wasteful.”

“He can take as much as he wants. We’re not in the third world here, you know!” Alex replied.

A bit of an argument started between them all and Josh and Candace just stared silently as it played out. Eventually Josh reached up to quickly eat a mouthful of food, hoping to cool the tension in the room, but he dumped his tumbler of apple juice over into the potatoes in the process. The conversations ceased all at once.

“I’m sorry,” Josh stammered.

“Go to your room, Josh,” Candace said. Her tone was flat and emotionless, as though she knew he would mess up somehow.

“Now, now, Candace, It was just an accident. That’s all.”

“He’s not eating anyway, he might as well go to his room.”

“He doesn’t have to go to his room. It’s Christmas for God’s sake. Give the kid a god damn break!”

“Please don’t use that kind of language in my presence. It’s not proper!”

“Can we all please just calm down. Let’s not argue like this. Please.”

“Well I don’t need to be told what kind of language I can and can’t use.”

“I don’t need to sit here and hear that kind of language.”

The conversation escalated like that and soon people were outright yelling at each other. Candace finally snapped.

“Josh! Go to your ‘goddamn’ room before you ruin Christmas for everyone! Now!”

Josh’s face curled up into a look of fear and heartbreak. He slid his plate off the table and carried it away with him from the dining room.

“There now. The problem has been removed. Can we all get back to eating?” Candace sneered. There was a lot more she wanted to add, but she restrained herself.

“Honestly. The kid didn’t’ have to be kicked out like that. It’s Christmas for God’s sake.”

Candace ignored him however and finally dug into her own plate of food. She had been robbed of Christmas, but at least she would enjoy the meal she worked so hard to prepare.

The conversation split off into various subjects among pairs of guests, but Candace just kept to herself, focusing only on her food, and the notion of a hot bath and a glass of wine after everyone finally left. The food was gradually consumed, cheer slowly returned to the table, and eventually everyone had completely forgotten about Josh.

“Are you planning on leaving any more milk and cookies for Santy this year, Alex?” Jack joked.

There was a chorus of laughter. Jack raised his glass. “Let’s hope not.”

Dinner was eventually finished and the group sat around sipping brandy, beer, and eggnog while Candace cleared the leftovers away, by herself once again. They complimented her on the meal once again, but she shrugged it off internally and busied herself with the cleaning.

“You should check on Josh, Candace,” Gwen suggested, as though she were just standing around doing nothing. “He’s been gone for almost twenty minutes now.”

Candace bit her tongue, resisting all the bitter comebacks she could have offered to that ‘suggestion’, and simply dropped what she was doing and went to check on Josh. She was sure she would find him playing with his Choo-Choo, or picking at his food, or coloring in his coloring book, or simply sulking, or even sleeping. Meanwhile there was cleaning to be done and nobody else made a move to help her in any way.

Josh was not in his room. He was not in her room either. He was not in the bathroom and he was not in the living room or kitchen. Surely he was feeling bitter and wanted to get back at them all by hiding, drawing attention to himself by making them all worry about him. He was not in the basement, or any of the closets.

“Have any of you seen Josh?” she said, poking her head into the dining room.

“He’s probably taken his presents and gone up to his room to open them I bet,” Grandpa Jack smiled. “He can’t hold out forever.”

Candace glanced behind her. His two little presents were indeed gone, but he was not in his room.

“I can’t find him. I’ve looked through the whole house.”

“Perhaps he took his toys out in the yard. What did you get him?”

“Talking Trucks,” Candace muttered as she turned to head for the back door.

Josh was not out in the back yard or the front yard, but Candace did notice his boots and his coat were gone. She slapped her hand immediately to her forehead. Suddenly she pieced the mystery together. Of course, it was so obvious. He’d unwrapped the presents while they were eating dinner, and had decided to take them to Tommy and Timmy to show off the cool new trucks he’d gotten.

“I told that little brat not to go anywhere!” she sputtered to herself, tugging on her own coat and boots. “He’s really in for it this time.”

“Where are you going, Candace?” Gwen asked, strolling into the hallway in shock. “You have guests.”

“Josh has run off to visit his little friends down the street. My guests will have to wait while I go and bring him home.”

“Honestly. You’d think you could control that boy. It’s Christmas day! He’s done nothing but defy you all day! He’s ruining Christmas. Honestly! It’s Christmas and you’re running out on your guests!”

Candace could hold back no longer.

“You know what, Gwen? Why don’t you go sit your fat ass down and drink your beloved brandies? I’ll be back to wait on you hand and foot after I get my son.”

With that she stormed out, without even closing the door behind her.

“Well, I never! Of all the insolence!” Gwen shouted. “I go out of my way to come all the way down here, and this is the treatment I get? It’s simply not proper. Come on Jack, we’re leaving!”

Candace did not even hear it, however. She was already halfway down the street. She had a bone to pick with Josh. One by one her guests left, taking their gifts and handfuls of dainties with them.

Candace was fuming. The little flakes of snow that fell from the leaden sky melted on her face almost with a hiss. What would she do to him? Ground him? Spank him? Confiscate every single toy he’d gotten that day? He had absolutely no excuse. All her preparations, all her hard work, stress, and worry was all ruined. It was a big catastrophe.

She looked down and could see his boot tracks in the freshly fallen snow, wandering down the sidewalk between the tracks of a sled. Had he taken his sled too? What was this kid thinking? Was he planning on going tobogganing with those grubby little runts as well?

“Not today, Joshy. You’re in nothing but trouble today.”

She was nearing the corner where Tommy and Timmy lived. Her boots crunched in the snow as she passed the mail box where Josh had deposited his letter to Santa the night before.

She stopped in her tracks for a moment. There on the ground was Josh’s letter. It was fluttering, half-buried under a small pile of snow. It did not have a stamp and was not even in an envelope. She saw his handwriting on it though: Santa Claus, North Pole. Please send this fast. Candace snatched it up, unfolded it and read it.

Dear Santa,

Its me Josh. We talked at the mal and you said that you did not have enough helpers. Remember? Anyway I jist want to say thank you for the presints I got. You are doing a grat job. Love, Josh.

Ps. Please help momma to under stand what you said about helping. She has been vary mad a lot. I don’t want to get in truble.

Helping? What did he mean by that? Why would he get in trouble for being helpful? If anything he was in trouble for taking off on his family on Christmas day, when she had specifically told him he was not allowed to. It was getting dark now too, and that made it even worse. Candace stuffed the letter into her pocket and rounded the corner.

What she saw around that corner, in front of Tommy and Timmy’s house, brought her instantly to tears.

The two kids were sitting excitedly on the front steps of their little apartment building and Josh stood in front of them. He was dressed in a little Santa suit, standing next to his little red sled, and he had a red pillow case over his shoulder. He dropped it to the ground and Candace could hear his little voice through the muffling snow fall, trying to sound deep and resonant, “Ho, ho, ho! Merry Christmas! Have you been good this year Tommy and Timmy?”

“Tommy jumped off a bridge, but I told him not to!” Timmy said.

“That’s okay, Tommy. I heard you’re a really good friend, so I brought you a present anyway. You shouldn’t make your mommy worry like that, though.”

“Do you have one for me too?” Timmy asked.

“Why yes I do, Timmy my boy, and it’s your favorite thing in the whole world!”

“Talking Trucks! Talking Trucks! Is it Talking Trucks?”

Candace leaned against the building she stood next to, almost wanting to fall down.

“Why don’t you open the presents and see?”

The little Santa reached into his sack and pulled out two carefully wrapped boxes. He gave one to each of them.

“Hey this says ‘To Josh, from Momma’”, Tommy commented.

“Oh sorry,” the deep little Santa voice said. “One of the elves must have put the wrong tags on there.”

Josh ripped the tags off and stuffed them back into the bag.

The boys tore the wrapping away and squealed in unison.

“Talking Trucks! Talking Trucks! They’re really real!”

The looks on their faces was pure joy, joy that Candace had never seen in all her life. They jumped off the steps and ran around in circles hoisting the gifts high in the air as they went and chanting “Talking Trucks! Talking trucks! Yay!”

Then they gave Josh a great big hug. Then they danced around some more.

“Ah thanks, Josh! You’re the best friend ever!” Tommy said. “You’re the best!”

He turned the toy over and over in his hands, admiring it as though it were the greatest thing in the universe.

“My name’s not Josh. It’s Santa!”

“Oh. Sorry, Santa,” Tommy grinned.

“I brought you some food too, guys, if you’re hungry, and some candy from my stocking, uh, I mean, from a stocking that some little kid didn’t want. Here you go. You can have it.”

The two boys sat on the stairs with their Talking Trucks close by their sides, and the little Santa served them one at a time from the plate of food that he had his sled. He had even brought little paper plates and napkins and forks.

“Sorry,” he said. “It’s a little cold.”

If the boys had any complaints, they didn’t say so. They dug in ravenously, grinning and chewing, and looking up and down from Josh to the piles of food in front of them.

“This… is… great…Josh!” Tommy mumbled between gulps.

“You’re the best, Josh!” Timmy added.

“I’ve got to go now, guys. Please don’t tell my mom about this. I’ll get in so much trouble. I’ll just tell her I lost the trucks or something.”

Candace broke down crying right then. She could not believe that her incredible little son would think he might get in trouble for all of this. He’d sacrificed his own presents, planned and thought through this whole idea probably for weeks, and now he had executed it, making his two little friends the happiest kids on earth. This was the most generous and thoughtful act she’d ever seen and she was more proud of him than she’d ever been his whole life. How could he possibly think he would get in trouble for it?

As if in response to her thoughts, Tommy asked, “Why would your mom get mad? Wouldn’t she be happy you were sharing?”

“You don’t know my mom. She’s very grumpy about giving things away. She says we can’t afford it. So I had to give these to you secret.”

Candace stepped away from the building she was leaning against and began walking toward her son.

“Josh,” she called out. Her voice cracked with emotion. Tommy and timmy snatched up the gifts and hid them behind their backs.

Josh turned around in surprise. “Momma?” he said. Though they hid the Talking trucks behind their backs, he knew he could not hide what was going on from his mother. He ran to her, waving his hands as if he could somehow block her view. “Momma, don’t come over here. Don’t look. Please. It’s a secret! You can’t see! Please don’t look.”

Candace did look though. She looked at the food, the stocking full of candy and treats, the piles of shredded wrapping paper and the red pillow sack. She saw the quiet awe and fear on the two boys’ faces.

“What are you doing, Josh?” she asked sadly.

Josh saw her tears and feared he had broken her heart with this little stunt. He feared he had ruined Christmas. He began to cry as well.

“Please, momma. Don’t look. I’m sorry. It’s just that Tommy and Timmy don’t have anything at all. They can’t even see their momma on Christmas ‘cause she has to work all day. They had no presents and no supper and I just felt awful. Please don’t be mad at me, I’m sorry.”

“Oh, Josh,” Candace said weakly. She dropped to her knees to face him, but he couldn’t look her in the eye.

“I’m sorry I lied to you, and didn’t eat, and made you feel bad. I’m sorry for everything. It’s just that when I asked Santa why he didn’t visit Tommy and Timmy last year, even though they were good, he said he couldn’t get to every house all the time. He said that’s why he needed helpers. He said I could be a little Santa and take some presents to them for him. He said that. He really did. Please don’t be mad.”

“So you planned all this from the start?”

“Yeah. I picked out presents that I knew they would like, and I took the Christmas money you gave me and bought a Santa suit. It was on sale, so I was lucky. It was normally $69.95, but there’s a big rip in the bum. I had to sew it. I hope you’re not too mad at me. I just wanted to be a good friend. I wanted to help Santa.”

“I’m not mad, Josh. You’ve done the nicest, most sweetest thing I ever saw. I’m so proud of you. I’m sorry you had to lie, and sneak around, and do this all in secret. I’m sorry. I haven’t been a very nice person. Can you forgive me?”

“You’re not mad?” Josh asked with confusion that made her feel even worse.

“No. Not at all. You’ve done a wonderful thing here. I’ll bet your friends are the two happiest kids on earth right now.”

“I guess so,” Josh smiled. “They were dancing around and everything. I was so happy, but I was scared too.”

“You were so brave, Josh,” Candace said. Then she added, “Thank you.”

“What for?” Josh asked, confused once again.

“Thank you for reminding me what Christmas is supposed to be all about.”

She hugged him tightly to herself, sniffling and sighing, almost drowning in the pride and joy she felt.

“Thanks, Josh,” Tommy said timidly, feeling it was now safe to speak.

“Yeah, thanks, Joshy!” Timmy added. “I am the happiest kid on earth. Really I am. Don’t get him in trouble, please Miss Josh’s Mom.”

“Momma?” Josh said hesitantly.

“What, my dear?”

“Can Tommy and Timmy come to our house for Christmas? I don’t want them to be all by themselves.”

Tommy and Timmy were silent, but obviously excited.

“I think that would be okay. As long as their mom says it’s okay.”

“Maybe their mom could come too,” Josh suggested. “Maybe we could give her a gift too, cause she didn’t’ get anything either.”

“She didn’t?” Candace asked the two boys.

They shook their heads. “No. We’ve hardly got money for the rent. She had to work on Christmas day so we wouldn’t get kicked out. She works really hard, but there’s just too much bills.”

Candace thought for a moment. Then she scribbled a note with their address and the situation, and Tommy ran into the house. Then they went home.

When Angela, their mother, arrived at the door an hour later she was ushered into the house with much ado. She was fed and entertained, while the boys played with the talking trucks. Candace waited on her and the boys hand and foot, but she didn’t mind so much. It was a joy to see this hard working single mom smile on a day she’d thought would be the most depressing of her life.